The Trust-to-Truth Advantage- Mark Dolan

[00:00:00] Hey guys, Corey Poirier here. Welcome to BluTalks and I hope you enjoy this video.

[00:00:29] Well thank you for that warm introduction. Buying a home is one of the most important and impactful experiences that any human being ever experiences. So my question is why do they treat the process exactly the same way that they do in our modern dating behaviors? Let me explain what I mean with

[00:00:58] that. Here we are in Cambridge, Massachusetts surrounded by all of these young energetic people that are in their dating lives on the Harvard campus and what do they do? They go to dating apps and they're looking at the dating app and they're grabbing information, they're looking at somebody, they're reading the information and then they do the dreaded swipe left. Rejection. Too tall.

[00:01:28] Forget that. But then there's some interest and they swipe right. That's exactly the same thing that is happening with buyers when they're looking for properties, whether it is a phone, a tablet or a computer. What they're doing is they're gathering information to try and disqualify the property. They say things like that home's too old or there's too many repairs that are necessary,

[00:02:00] that the property is overpriced. There's something that's wrong with it and so they swipe left and they disqualify that property. But then they're faced with a dilemma. What happens when there's a home that meets all the criteria that is there and they're forced to make the dreaded phone call

[00:02:22] to the real estate salesperson? That's when the friction begins because buyers are taught stranger danger. They don't know who you are, they don't know what you believe and they don't know what you stand for. And what they're doing when they call for you is they are looking for information so that they can disqualify the property. They're probably not even interested in who answers the phone. But they never

[00:02:49] remember what is going on in the mind of the real estate professional. Every day real estate people wake up, they're unemployed, no salary, no health care, and no safety net. And their entire future depends on taking that telephone call and going from a lead to a closing. And it creates what I call a relationship

[00:03:13] of resistance. That's what happens every single day in real estate offices all over the country. Now this problem is solely in the hand of the salesperson to change the result. And it requires training. Every single real estate agent I've ever heard that got into the business was told when they

[00:03:36] first got there, fake it till you make it. Anybody hear that? Fake it till you make it. Well, I think that we need to do better than that. In order to work with buyers effectively, we need to change from being an information booth to a trusted advisor. Because if we're an information booth when they

[00:04:00] disqualify that property and swipe left, there we go along with it. We want to change that to the point where we become part of the decision making process. So that even when we give them bad news, they continue working with us and they don't worry about losing us with the property. So my trust to truth method is

[00:04:25] exactly the way that I train salespeople to overcome that. Because in the mind of any buyer, there are three hidden questions. The first question is, are you safe? Safe enough to tell my secrets to? Safe enough to share my fears with? They don't know that when they first talk with you. The second question is, are you

[00:04:52] competent? Do you know what you're doing? Do you answer the questions? And the third thing is, if you're competent, are you going to use your professionalism as my advocate? Or am I just another commission to you? So here's how we adapt those three things into a real conversation. The first thing that we want to do is we know

[00:05:16] that we're sending signals to people. We don't tell them, hey, I'm great. Hey, I'm trustworthy. If you tell people things, they're not going to believe you. That's just information that they're going to sift through and maybe disqualify you. They're going to make their judgments based on your behavior. The look on your face, your body language, whether you're rushing them. I have this really bad habit because I'm such an

[00:05:42] intense person. And I was taught this by a coach about 20 years ago. He said, Mark, you have a great smile. And I said, well, thanks, Mike. And he said, no, you really have this great smile. You light up the room. And I said, Mike, I can appreciate that. But what do you mean? And he says, we don't see it very often. And I says, well, what do you mean? And he says, you know, it's that crunch that you have in your forehead right here. He says, our coaches need to be approachable. And that look that's on your face

[00:06:12] tells people you're angry and unapproachable. Now, that's exactly the opposite message of what I was trying to send. The message I wanted to send was that I'm intensely interested in what you're saying. And so I'm paying attention. So my Control Before Confidence course is designed to help people recognize the signals that we're sending to people that don't work and to give us the practice and the

[00:06:39] muscle memory to change those behavior, to eliminate the friction with people so that we can be more effective in working with them. The second habit or the second question that they have is, are you competent? And again, we can't say, hey, I know the market. I'm really great. What you have to do is demonstrate that. So it happens by the way that you answer their questions. Do you answer them? Do you

[00:07:04] avoid them? Do they express some interest and you immediately close on them? What is your response? They want to know that you're competent. The third thing is, will you be my advocate? Now, what we're trying to do is create a sense of trust with that client. And if we have given them warm signals where warmth opens the door and they believe that we're competent, they're going to ask us

[00:07:30] a question that is going to be perceived by us as a threat. And usually it's in the form of them sharing their truth about a fear or an objection or a concern. And it's your behavior that is going to dictate whether you move forward or not. Because if your first reaction is to overcome the objection, which is what all salespeople are taught to do, you're going to lose the advocacy test.

[00:07:58] The better response is to ask more questions and to probe and to probe again and then summarize what they've said so that they know that you're interested in them. So I want to give you two examples. One is a bad example of how things don't work. And then one, I hope, is something that will show you what does work. I made a presentation several weeks ago to about 25 real estate agents in my hometown. And I made the point during that presentation that I still

[00:08:28] owned commercial property in that area and that no one ever asked me what I planned to do with my property. And I was talking to a bunch of real estate people. I said, you guys aren't even in the game because you're not asking the question. So about five hours later, I got two texts from two different agents. And it said, Mark, you mentioned this morning that you own property here. And I was wondering if you wanted to talk with me about what your plans were for the future. Maybe we could

[00:08:55] spend some time together talking about it. Maybe I could list it for you. Both people approached me the same way. My response was two things. Number one, great job for getting out there and getting in the game and asking the question. I said, however, you missed the point of the class. And the class was that you shared with me what was important to you, which was making an appointment, which was

[00:09:20] certainly to your benefit. But you never asked me anything about me. And you never made it important for me to want to meet with you. That's exactly what we don't want to do as real estate people. And that's what most people do, right? Here's a better example. 25 years ago, I have a process and I have a new buyer. Her name is Marge Peterson. Marge Peterson wants to look at property.

[00:09:46] And we set an appointment for a Saturday morning and she walks in. And I have a list of properties that I want to show her based on what she had told me in the interview. And I had a process. I tested her. I gave her a stack of the flyers because this was before the internet. And I said, Marge, I'd like for you to take a look at this and tell me which ones sort of stand out for you, pros and cons, what you like and what you don't like. I'm just wanting to see if we're on the right track.

[00:10:15] And so with a sort of a grimace on her face, she sort of flipped through the flyers and she looked me directly in the eye and she said, Mark, you're going to have to do a hell of a lot better than that. Whoa! Big shot across the bow, right? The receptionist's eyes got wide as saucers. Everybody else in the room was waiting to see what I would say next. And my response was, that's okay, Marge. I said, I know the inventory very well and I'd like to start here if it's okay

[00:10:43] with you based on the answers you gave me. But as we go through the properties, I'm going to be listening to what you like and don't like about each one and we will make the changes necessary to find you what you want. How does that sound? She said, okay. I didn't fight her. I didn't defend myself. I acknowledged her response and didn't fight back with her. And I proceeded to

[00:11:08] go on and I did. I asked, I probed, I probed again, I summarized. And I swear at the end of the first house when we walked out, everything changed. Her body language changed. I think she actually put her hand on my shoulder as she was walking out. The wall had gone down. She started telling me intimate details about her needs or wishes, her fears, her dreams. I learned that her son Pete was

[00:11:35] named after her late husband. And she said, Pete and repeat. I became family friends with them. And that is what real estate professionals need to be if they want a long-term career in real estate. So let me recap. The trust to truth method means that we are sending signals to people that are

[00:11:59] going to answer the question, are we safe? Are we competent? And will we be their advocate? We need to pass that test. And instead of faking it until you make it, by control before confidence course gives the practice so that those behaviors and those scripts and those dialogues and those thought processes become internalized and become part of your muscle memory. So that you get rid of all

[00:12:28] those bad habits that you used to have and end with a smile. And hopefully from now on, your clients

[00:12:35] will swipe right and not left. Thank you. This podcast is a part of the C-Suite Radio Network.

[00:13:54] For more top business podcasts, visit c-suiteradio.com.