Connectedness- Morgan Massie

[00:00:00] Hey guys, Corey Poirier here. Welcome to BluTalks and I hope you enjoy this video.

[00:00:29] Hello everyone to Harvard and as I was coming in this morning walking around Harvard Yard seeing all the sights I came to realize that we're in the College of Education, Longfellow Hall today and there's a crest for each uh for each college at Harvard this one says Veritas Latin for truth and how coincidentally wonderful that we're standing on the stage of truth today and I'm

[00:00:57] going to tell you a little bit of truth. I did not prepare for this talk on purpose because later this summer I'm teaching a class on public speaking and as part of that class I'm trying to teach a new framework that I've come up with over the years based off of how I've been able to develop a rapid framework of talking on any topic that you know so that if you have very little time to prepare to be

[00:01:24] on stage what can you do to be seen and perceived as the expert we all know you are and what you need to talk about. Having worked for 20 plus years in training and development organization and talent strategy, having been on the TEDx stage twice and worked with some really wonderful mentors, one mentor of mine as I'm cramming before stepping onto that red dot stage, sang to me and I am not a

[00:01:52] singer but here it goes. So do you remember the song, if you don't love me by now, you will never never never love me. However, she said, if you don't know it by now, you will never never never know it. Get some sleep, Morgan. All right, I took her advice. So you fall asleep, you think about your talk in your head,

[00:02:21] you know that you're the expert that you are and you wake up and you get ready to stand on that stage. So this is a talk within a talk today, actually. So let me tell you about this talk strategy that I have. I call it land your talk and land is an easy acronym that you can use to kind of think through what do I need to do if I don't have a lot of time to prepare to make sure that I'm solid on that stage.

[00:02:47] Land, four things. You can stretch it out as long as you need to, as short as you need to. The first one is lean in, lean into your audience. What are you going to do in those first couple seconds when you're there on stage to capture their attention? Because as we know, first impressions take only a few seconds, right? So are you going to ask a question? Are you going to launch right into a personal story? What are you going to do to captivate their audience? So they

[00:03:12] are literally leaning in. Second one, A is anchor them there. Once you've captured their attention, you need to keep it. So what are you going to do to anchor them into your story? So they are just hanging on every word that you have to say next. The next one, N, is for that news bite. Having been on the news a number of times over the years in my different roles, I've learned it's all about sound

[00:03:36] bites. So is there a piece of industry metric or is there some percentage or some tidbit of truth that you want to share? Give them that news bite. And then D, drive them to action. What do you want people to do as a result of your talk? Are you just up here talking for your own health? I mean, hey, it's fun and all, but it's the number one fear of most humans out there, public speaking, right? So if you're up here, you better make it worth your while and worth the audience while too.

[00:04:06] So drive them to action. All right. So I'm going to use that, this land framework to launch into a short mini talk to show you how this happens on stage in the moment. So I mentioned, uh, in the introduction that I have a book coming out called the connected CEO, connected CEO is based off of some research that I've done over the last couple of years in the area of connected and connected leadership,

[00:04:33] something I'm focusing on, uh, with my dissertation and going a little bit deeper in that. And how does connection show up when we lead? We're leading from the stage when we're speakers. So you can take it in any context you want leader of your community, leader of your organization, your team leading the stage, you name it, right? So how many of you raise your hands are speakers this week? I know there's a lot of you out there, right? Right. How many of you are speakers today? All right. For those of you that

[00:05:03] were speakers yesterday, raise your hand. All right. So when you come onto that stage, how connected do you feel to yourself? Think about that for a minute, because what I'm finding in this model of connectedness that I'm discovering as I'm talking to different leaders across different industries, entertainers, business owners, nonprofit leaders, uh, team managers up and down and across the organization and throughout our

[00:05:31] community, as well as stage performers. What I'm finding is that the most effective ones are connected to themselves. I know what I stand for. I know what I know. I know the skills that I bring to the table. I am resolved with that. And so I can bring that forward in my leadership. I can bring that forward in my talk. So that's number one connection to self. Number two is connection to others. So for those of you that spoke yesterday, hopefully you took some time to connect with people in the audience before

[00:06:01] you stepped on that stage, because what we're finding in the research is that more, the more effective leaders and the more effective speakers are the ones that are able to build that personal connection and trust with at least one person in the audience before they come on stage, before they perform in front of their team. Because if you don't have that connection to others, it's really lonely up here, isn't it? And we don't like to feel alone as humans were hardwired for connection actually. So what are you

[00:06:30] doing to help yourself by connecting with at least one person before you go on that stage? And number three, number three was interesting in my research as I'm talking to different leaders across different industries. It was this concept of connection to context. So I had to think there and pause for a moment. Connection to context. What is that? Well, it's basically situational awareness. I know who I am and what I bring to the table. I know the message that I want to deliver to all of you today,

[00:07:00] right? But I also have to realize that I might need to adjust who I am and what I say based off of the audience that I'm delivering it to, based off of the audience that I'm managing, whoever I'm influencing, or providing information to at the time, right? So we have those three pieces of information there. Connection to self, connection to others, and connection to the context that we're in.

[00:07:25] That can make us feel rooted in the moment so we can bring our true selves, our most confident selves, to whatever it is that we're leading, influencing, supporting, speaking, delivering our message. So as we think about it, that whole land your talk concept, I've given you three ways that you can lean in to connection to yourself, connection to others, and connection to the context to really make sure

[00:07:51] that you're bringing your full self to the stage. I want to anchor it in because here's what we have been noticing. Even the most prepared, the most capable, the most high performing leaders and speakers can still feel disconnected from time to time when it matters most. And here's what I've come to realize, that we don't have to have, or we actually don't have a preparation issue. Each of us as speakers and

[00:08:19] as leaders, we spend hours upon hours to prepare what we have to do and deliver and how we're going to perform. What we really have at the root of it all is a connection issue. And that lack of connection in one of those three areas is the downfall of the impact that we truly want to make and the impact that we're actually making. Over the past year, as I mentioned, I've had a lot of time to talk to

[00:08:47] other leaders across different industries, executives, founders, and community leaders, different roles, different challenges. But underneath all of it, I kept seeing the same pattern. They're all very capable, driven, and successful. But that fear of disconnection crept up. And so the leaders who were the most effective weren't the ones that were doing more. They weren't

[00:09:13] the ones that were preparing more. They were the ones that were staying connected in those three ways. They could feel when something wasn't landing and they knew how to adjust in the moment, in real time, their message to the audience so they could keep that connection with them from the start and to the finish. Which brings us right back to that moment when you realize that when something isn't landing

[00:09:39] the way that you thought it would or thought it could, that is not a preparation problem for you. That is a connection problem. Who can you look at in the audience and find that safe space? Find that smile. Find that person that's attuned to who you are and what you're doing. You can see nodding in the audience. Even if you're a leader of teams, even if you're on a Zoom call, you can find

[00:10:02] that one person that's connected to you. Focus in on them, find your center, and then go from there. So here's something that you can do starting today. So before your next leadership moment, before those of you taking the stage today, come up here on this stage. Ask yourself these three

[00:10:24] questions as it relates to connection to self. Am I connected to what matters most to me right now? What is the outcome of my talk? What is the outcome of this meeting? Am I connected to that? Connection. Connection to others. What might be happening for people in the audience today?

[00:10:47] How might I need to adjust to be there to be the right leader or right speaker for them in this moment? And connection to context. What does this moment actually require of me? Do I need to be more direct? Do I need to be more humorous? Do I need to take a step back and be more passive? We need to be able to adjust in the moment to show up as our best selves. So three questions, less than 10 seconds to think

[00:11:14] through those for yourselves so you can land on that stage and be the most grounded, solid, confident person that you can be to deliver your message. That shifts you from reacting to stalling to stuttering to being a more confident, rooted individual. We spend so much time preparing what to say,

[00:11:42] what to do, how to perform, how to be perfect. Shove all that out the window because none of us are perfect. It's okay to mess up. It's okay to miss that point that you really wanted to make. Hey, there's opportunities tomorrow to make that point on a different stage with a different audience. That wasn't the intent today. Move past it. And what can you do now to recalibrate? The leaders who have the

[00:12:07] greatest impact aren't the most prepared. They're the most connected because leadership isn't about

[00:12:15] what you do. It's about what you stay connected to. Thank you. Hey guys, Cory Cory here. Welcome to

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